(Update 11/2/2011-- Justin's Paternity Lawsuit:
First, Justin Bieber is a "Billion Dollar Baby" and perhaps the biggest cash cow in show biz at the moment. He was due for some sordid sensational headlines given his squeaky clean image.
Accordingly, we'll leave all the sensationalistic details about Justin fathering a child to RadarOnline who seems to have cornered the instant hype about 20 year old Mariah Yeater claiming Justin is the father of her 3 month baby and says so in a lawsuit filed today asking for "SUPPORT" and a paternity test to prove Beiber IS the father, and provide our unrelated cursory commentary on the subject matter.
Does he shave? Does he have his pubes yet? Has he started his masturbation phase? His voice started to change just this past Summer. So it's a bit difficult to think Justin is a daddy because he would have had to be potent over a year ago. The numbers and his physical maturity aren't adding up here.
Alexander the Great fathered his first child at 14, so it's possible, we suppose. It's a simple matter of maturation and Justin just turned 17. So?
With a billion dollar property in the hands of those who know how to handle and spin a billion dollar property, we have all the confidence in the world that Justin will be just fine as he approaches his 18th year.
Law Enforcement officials have stated there "may" be an investigation into this matter. Well......Justin was 15 or 16 when Mariah conceived her child and she was 18 or 19, which means Justin may be the victim of STATUTORY RAPE!
Justin Bieber is one of the new 'tween-teen' phenoms in the Disney 'Manufacture a Star' Company tradition.
Apparently Justin has sold millions of records and this weekend had a 3-D Concert Movie coming out everywhere which is probably why he's EVERYWHERE!
Every where means EVERYWHERE!
Although Justin Bieber has been on the pop scene for a year or so and we'd heard his name, we didn't know what he looked like or sounded like.
Being over 18, we didn't have any interest in another factory product from tinsel town intended to bring 'cash' to the shareholders of another corporate entity. But over the past week or so Justin Bieber has EVERYWHERE and he was hard to miss.
We finally saw Bieber last Saturday night on SNL and again on The Super Bowl in a commercial. He is also on magazine covers EVERYWHERE, including Vanity Fair and MAD!
Our take on Justin is that he's a pixie-like, clean cut young white-boy who looks like he doesn't shave yet with an odd hair style. He does wear his pants almost where they should be worn in a civilized way and not below his butt.
The budget for his movie must have been really BIG, else he wouldn't be EVERYWHERE. These films are 'front-load' products, meaning that his film must make all it's money back in it's first few days of release or it's a flop. Front loaded films fade fast, so the manufacturers must make their money quick or eat a loss.
So, get ready for the ancillary products. The tee-shirts, hats, lunch boxes, CD's, and an early release of the DVD. Maybe a Justin Bieber memoir too?
So, parents and grandparents, older friends and responsible family members, this is our teen-tween pop culture minute for the week. Looking on the positive side, it could be worse.
We've included some pictures in this article because you, like us, had probably never seen Justin Bieber. But by now you doubtless have seen him because he's been EVERYWHERE!